Using certain words or not using them (help!)

DaiStation · Post by **DaiStation** » Fri May 25, 2007 1:43 pm 0

Flabio wrote:"Like a stuck record" would be the usual literary cliche there.

Like an iPod on shuffle but with only one track loaded.

TFO · Post by **TFO** » Fri May 25, 2007 1:45 pm 0

Like Sky Movies...

kalmar · Post by **kalmar** » Fri May 25, 2007 1:45 pm 0

Mayhem wrote:
Flabio wrote:Eraseable might be a better word to use, depends on the context.
Yeah this is the other word I was considering instead.

The line as it currently stands is "...his mind constantly rewinding back and replaying the events of three days ago like some unwipeable videotape."

It's not bad. That word still sticks out a bit, but perhaps it's just because you've drawn attention to it

"the events of three days ago playing back in his mind, over and over, like a video tape on a never ending loop"

perhaps?

or replace "unwipeable" by "everlasting".

Mayhem · Post by **Mayhem** » Fri May 25, 2007 2:08 pm 0

I think the idea I want to get over is that nothing done will remove the thoughts in question from the mind, hence the reference to unwipeable or uneraseable. Not the part that going over them is stuck on loop (which it is, but it's not the primary emphasis here). Neither does "write protected" either because you can just make it "write unprotected" and erase away.

I'm tempted to switch it over to uneraseable but we'll see...

kalmar · Post by **kalmar** » Fri May 25, 2007 2:16 pm 0

Mayhem wrote:I think the idea I want to get over is that nothing done will remove the thoughts in question from the mind

What's wrong with 'everlasting' then?

hence the reference to unwipeable or uneraseable. Not the part that going over them is stuck on loop (which it is, but it's not the primary emphasis here). Neither does "write protected" either because you can just make it "write unprotected" and erase away.

I think you might be taking the metaphor a bit far.. Even if the tape is un-erasable, you could still turn it off

XOR · Post by **XOR** » Fri May 25, 2007 2:17 pm 0

indelible;

- adjective (of ink or a pen) making marks that cannot be removed.

- not able to be forgotten or removed : his story made an indelible impression on me.

Any good?

l1n3n01z · Post by **l1n3n01z** » Fri May 25, 2007 2:33 pm 0

Mayhem wrote:I think the idea I want to get over is that nothing done will remove the thoughts in question from the mind, hence the reference to unwipeable or uneraseable. Not the part that going over them is stuck on loop (which it is, but it's not the primary emphasis here). Neither does "write protected" either because you can just make it "write unprotected" and erase away.

I'm tempted to switch it over to uneraseable but we'll see...

indelible?

kalmar · Post by **kalmar** » Fri May 25, 2007 2:35 pm 0

inedible?

DaiStation · Post by **DaiStation** » Fri May 25, 2007 2:36 pm 0

l1n3n01z wrote:
Mayhem wrote:I think the idea I want to get over is that nothing done will remove the thoughts in question from the mind[...]
I'm tempted to switch it over to uneraseable but we'll see...
indelible?

Cached by Google?

Mayhem · Post by **Mayhem** » Fri May 25, 2007 2:48 pm 0

Everlasting would be good imo if I wasn't using videotape metaphors... doesn't seem to sound right together imo. Now gobstoppers, yes I would use it

Likewise indelible... I could change "videotape" then to something else but it just completely fits the "playing over and over again" aspect.

Argghh, why is writing so hard at times?!

kalmar · Post by **kalmar** » Fri May 25, 2007 2:52 pm 0

"like a disturbing video loop in a traumatic modern art installation"

XOR · Post by **XOR** » Fri May 25, 2007 2:53 pm 0

l1n3n01z wrote:
Mayhem wrote:I think the idea I want to get over is that nothing done will remove the thoughts in question from the mind, hence the reference to unwipeable or uneraseable. Not the part that going over them is stuck on loop (which it is, but it's not the primary emphasis here). Neither does "write protected" either because you can just make it "write unprotected" and erase away.

I'm tempted to switch it over to uneraseable but we'll see...
indelible?

Yup.

The line as it currently stands is "...his mind constantly rewinding back and replaying the events of three days ago, like indelible images on videotape."

I'd be happier with that than any 'un-' word.

XOR · Post by **XOR** » Fri May 25, 2007 2:58 pm 0

Mayhem wrote:Everlasting would be good imo if I wasn't using videotape metaphors... doesn't seem to sound right together imo. Now gobstoppers, yes I would use it

Likewise indelible... I could change "videotape" then to something else but it just completely fits the "playing over and over again" aspect.

Argghh, why is writing so hard at times?!

You don't have to change the videotape to anything else. Just because the definition includes ink and pen, doesn't mean it can't be applied in another context (see above post). The second definition below covers that...

indelible;

- adjective (of ink or a pen) making marks that cannot be removed.

- not able to be forgotten or removed : his story made an indelible impression on me.

Not saying it's perfect, but I'd use it over the other options. But then I think I'm bloody wonderful.

WiteWulf · Post by **WiteWulf** » Fri May 25, 2007 3:07 pm 0

Mayhem wrote: @Witewolf - I did claim better, not perfect heh. And "speeling" indeed

It was a deliberate mistake and one which is practically compulsory in this sort of discussion

...and I was about to suggest indelible, too, but got called away to an important meeting at the pub

l1n3n01z · Post by **l1n3n01z** » Fri May 25, 2007 3:16 pm 0

kalmar wrote:inedible?

Yeah, I like that.

"My memory had an indigestion, trying to cope with black flat noodles of inedible videotapes"