As always a very thoughtful and detailed post that I feel a little guilty not to find the energy to respond to point by point at this time, but I know you come from a position of kindness and my remarks aren't aimed directly at you or any particular poster but a general feeling of "everyone is jumping on this one"KlaxonCow wrote:I regret having mentioned it now.Cloudane wrote:I get the message. I feel like shit. Being one of those timid people who rarely puts my foot down has always been a problem and now it could be hazardous to others. Believe me, if it wasn't for the people it'd hurt, I'd do the world a favour.
To be clear, I was not telling you off in the slightest.
Indeed, the first half of my post was wholly in defence of your assessment that those "fake cough" kids were being twats, and it is not at all "dehumanising" to point this out. On the contrary, it's "special pleading" that they, unlike other human beings, are a special exception to basic behavioural standards and common human decency, who need their alleged feelings - and it is alleged, as we have zero evidence and it's pure speculation that they're remotely bothered by any of this - wrapped up in cotton wool. Bollocks.
Your father is his own autonomous being. He is the captain of his own ship. I don't - and wasn't - expecting you to physically police him, against his wishes.
But it was more a hint to impress upon him, if he's not already got it by now, that it really, really is a good idea to comply with the advice on self-isolation. As I would say to, frankly, absolutely everyone right now.
The "I suggest ruthless emotional blackmail and ceaseless nagging" was said tongue-in-cheek, fully recognising that I entirely know what it's like.
My mother - who is also in the vulnerable group - does various things with her church and, boy, did it require a lot of "emotional blackmail and ceaseless nagging" to get her to eventually accept that she should go nowhere and I'll deal with things. It was not remotely meant as any criticism, more of a "yeah, I know that one myself - but, really, right now, nag the old folks into compliance".
I get it. I really do. The generation that saw the war's end / lived in its immediate aftermath - because things continued to remain shit for a while after it ended - do tend to have a "mend and make do" attitude, to carry on regardless and never make a single complaint about anything. Oh, and they utterly refuse to see the doctor, even when their legs are half hanging off.
Anyway, you shouldn't feel bad because, statistically speaking, it's grossly unlikely that this incident will lead to anything at all.
I was only advising precaution - aimed more at your father than you, as I consider him to be his own autonomous being, because I have one exactly like that myself, so I do know the stress and frustration involved - but perhaps my empathy, as that really was the motivation, might have been phrased poorly in this instance.
It may not seem like it with that one weakness but we are actually treating this seriously and he has actually reflected on the risks taken - we're pretty much in that situation a bit like when you saw a speed camera where you wait a couple of weeks to see if there are any consequences. Hopefully not. For what it's worth we're ALL had washing constantly, taking care not to touch anything unnecessarily when out (which I'll ask more sternly is just me from here on out if groceries are needed), using an alcohol based wipe on the handle of any baskets, hand sanitizer on entry and exit etc. Hopefully that will have helped.
Giving up the pub a week before everyone else was a pretty big move as we go as well... I know, it probably should have been two weeks before...





