Banker Wankers

Inane baanter or words of wisdom - you decide...
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TFO
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Banker Wankers

Post by TFO »

So, I have a loan with HSBC, and I have some money in my other bank account so I want to pay off the loan. The last statement I have says I have to ring up for the amount and then I can pay it off.

So, I call the (not freephone) number stated at the top and finally get through to [insert unintelligible name of sub-continental telephone grunt here] who starts the call with “good evening” (it is 2pm here).
I explain twice what I want to do - as she didn’t understand the first time. She then goes through a stack of “security questions” i.e. my name, dob, address, account number etc.
I then get out in hold for about 5 minutes.
After that wait she comes back on and says she can’t let me pay off my loan as my security questions were incorrect. I asked her which ones as I answered each one correctly, and she then stated that they were wrong because I don’t have telephone banking set up so I have to do it in branch (Telephone banking takes 7 working days to set up, and the letter I have makes zero mention of this)
I said why? I want to give you money and pay off my loan using my money from my account. Nope.

I did ask her how she personally thought that this whole scenario might be security risk to anyone, but not being paid to think for herself she didn’t understand this question

I can’t get into town as my branch is now shut (Saturday). So I have to take time off work next week to trudge in, pay to park and visit the branch. If they tell me I have to do it over the phone I’ll be fricking furious...

:x
Sit down you little bastard
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gilesgoat
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Re: Banker Wankers

Post by gilesgoat »

People that insist that "everything should be digital only" or shit like that I'd point them to stories like yours.

Because "yes it works until there's a glitch in the system" ( or ever worse someone cracks it ) ... been there is "various shit" like your a few times .. like when someone of the banks "decided" to send stuff to an address that wasn't the right one for reasons the only know ..

Or when the TV license guys went on FOR 3 YEARS !! Sending *CRAP* all time here - finally after 3 years someone came in person !!! - because THEY made a mistake about the address and were convinced "nobody was paying a TV license here" despite TON of evidence ..

Or when someone in a bank in town, A BANK EMPLOYEE, could not work out what 20% was and were trying to explain "look what you propose is LOT more expensive" ..

Ah ALSO .. "the beauty of UK bank system" .. it's like "the rest of the world should not exist" .. try to move money in/out UK to Europe or non-eu/non-US stuff "despite all the shit they tell you - LIES " you WILL see how much CRAP you'll go into !!

IBAN ? BIC ? ABI ? "international account numbers/bank coordinates ?" .. "we don't know - or pretend NOT to know - about that" ...

ONLINE BANKING !!!

*DO NOT MAKE ME START HERE* !!

YES .. to make you SPEND money and possibly LOOSE money and possibly "pay for something you did not know you had to pay" .. that works ..

For any other SERIOUS USE ... NO FRAKING WAY ! "Computer says NO!" ..

Of course you CAN NOT pay your loan .. because you MUST fall into MORE DEBT first !! "They can't make it easy for you to get out of there !"

Well .. what to say .. '1' would be "don't ever get loans of any sort" ... '2' "destory any credit card" .. '3' store things somewhere else, consider money could be worthless any time :roll:

I am optimistic .. :lol: :mrgreen:

Banks .. "another semi legalised robbery" ..
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TFO
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Re: Banker Wankers

Post by TFO »

Went into the branch. They refused to process it as I had to do it over the phone.
FUCKERS

In the end I made enough of a fuss in front of the other customers that the supervisor agreed to help. And even then I had to walk to my own bank to transfer the cash.

I genuinely hope that the useless fucktard on the end of the phone at the weekend, and the puffed up cow on the till today are both part of the 10,000 job losses that HSBC announced today. But not the nice supervisor lady. She can stay.
Sit down you little bastard
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zip accident
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Re: Banker Wankers

Post by zip accident »

TFO wrote:Went into the branch. They refused to process it as I had to do it over the phone.
FUCKERS

In the end I made enough of a fuss in front of the other customers that the supervisor agreed to help. And even then I had to walk to my own bank to transfer the cash.

I genuinely hope that the useless fucktard on the end of the phone at the weekend, and the puffed up cow on the till today are both part of the 10,000 job losses that HSBC announced today. But not the nice supervisor lady. She can stay.
Nope, it seems to be the ones with less skills and experience who are staying, probably because their wages are lower.
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Re: Banker Wankers

Post by Nixie »

Had a similar issue recently transferring most of my account to another (also in my name, same address...) Failed the security questions. Was apparently fine to just close the account though and then was asked where the funds should be transferred to...

Facepalm!!!!
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Re: Banker Wankers

Post by KlaxonCow »

"Words ought to be a little wild - for they are assaults of thought on the unthinking."
- John Maynard Keynes
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Re: Banker Wankers

Post by Nixie »

Haha!

I met David Walliams last year, really nice chap!
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